Growing up, I heard the line “Brave kids don’t cry” way too many times. And frankly, it was a great way to make four year olds stop crying. Being brave was our fantasy then, the very limit to our wild imaginations.

But then, we grew up. All of us did. And recently, when I heard this line again, something felt different. It was like this epiphany, this sudden realisation. When we tell kids that it’s not being brave when you cry, we’re indirectly telling them that crying is cowardice. No, it’s not.

I get the fact that we’re just saying this to make kids stop crying, right? But as adults, we have no idea what goes in kids’ minds. If that one line gets stuck in their head, it could severely impact mental health as they grow up.

Crying needs to be de-stigmatized from the status it is at right now. It is not “girly” or “sissy” or “childish”. People don’t cry because they’re weak. Sometimes, it’s just because things hurt too much. It’s because whatever strength they had is starting to crumble. People cry simply because life is overwhelming once in a while. And it is perfectly okay.

To break down, to cry, to feel like drowning is okay. Do not let anyone tell you that’s weak. The sole fact that you are living today, thriving in a world that has the capability to rip you apart, proves how brave you are. Remember that.

It is better to let out emotions that keep them in ourselves. Sometimes the sheer magnitude of those emotions in us becomes so large, it causes us to fall. Harder than we would have if the emotions would have come out in the first place.

Parents… please teach your kids that being brave means standing up against injustice. Being brave means having courage to express their feelings. Being brave means having guts to do what you really want, and not fit into the stereotypes that society has placed in front of us. Being brave means making your mark out in the world.

Grow. If growing means falling apart, then so be it. Even a phoenix dies in order to be resurrected, in order to come back stronger. If growing means shattering and then re-building, then so be it. After a devastating earthquake, even the largest metropolis in the world comes back from broken pieces of textiles and cement.

What I’m saying is, once you’re done crying, once you’re done letting out whatever was churning inside of you, once you’re clean, come back to ground zero. Or ground five, or fifteen, or wherever you left yourself. And start again.

Mindless Memoirs

a journey to remember.

Date

January 11, 2021

Brave kids cry too.

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